No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
I booty called her while she was in labor.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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