Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
The thing is that despite the high paying career and the increased responsibility, my life hasn't changed that much. Only instead of blacking out on $2 wells at some dive I blackout on top shelf martinis in a suit. Oh and only on Fri & Sat nights. Being 30 doesn't suck as bad as everyone led me to believe.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
He ran out to tell us that somebody flooded the bathroom, then went back in there fell on his ass and asked why the floor was wet
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize