Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize