You can't special order awesome
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
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