fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Randomize