i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
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i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize