I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My horoscope told me I'm getting laid tonight. Please don't make the stars be liars
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Randomize