Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
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I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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