he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this will be a night to untag.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
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