Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why wouldn't u just let me ride the washing machine
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize