Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she pinky promised me she was 18
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
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