Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
She brought a box of chocolates to give the bartender and now he's giving her free shots.. Why didn't we think of that?
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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