Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Do you still have your period?
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Randomize