I don't think brook has ever known best
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
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