i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
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