Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Pants 0. Shit 1.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
We just shotgunned beers for America
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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