I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Randomize