I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
my mom found all the used condoms in my bed side table
whatd she say to you?
no words- put them all in a circle, put the bible in the middle
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
