It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
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well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
In their defense you were hugging a watermelon for a good portion of the trip
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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