I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Was not aware that standing loudly up off the couch and loudly, drunkenly slurring "I'M EIGHTEEN NOW BITCHES" counted as a primitive mating call.
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize