Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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