So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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