I'm sorry my penis didn't work
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Just used "I used to work as an inflatable toy operator" as a pick up line. Freshman frenzy is great...
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
This toilet bowl is my home.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize