Vomit. Vomit. Whatever. You wear a tiara in public.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
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he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
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And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
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