HIV tests are more positive than that guy
i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
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