is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
She even gives head with a lisp.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
I think I just sharted jello shots
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