Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Randomize