just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Randomize