Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
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Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
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sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
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