i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize