maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
Sorry about my life...
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
There are leaves in my underwear?
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