There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
i think i have two assholes
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
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