a queef is a wish your heart makes.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
How drunk are you?
Completed.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
why is half of my head shaved?
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