her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
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So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
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He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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