All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
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