Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
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