if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize