meet me in the bathroom in 10 mins.
wait what? who are you hooking up with in the bathroom?!
aww shit wrong text.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
Just warning you the last time I had captain Morgan I gave a blow job to a guy that looked like Jesus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Hey, what's a nice way of saying "Why'd you send me a picture of your boobs last night" without seeming ungrateful?
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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