Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize