Texts From Last Night

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  (843): View more from South Carolina

  Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.

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  (843): Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca. http://tfl.nu/m05t
  Replies (21) Good night (634) Bad night (2569) Order T-Shirt
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  (225): View more from Louisiana

  I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  Who won?

  (225): View more from Louisiana

  All of them.

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  (225): I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away. (504): Who won? (225): All of them. http://tfl.nu/xlra
  Replies (81) Good night (9341) Bad night (1574)
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  (602): View more from Arizona

  but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.

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  (602): but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please. http://tfl.nu/sk7q
  Replies (14) Good night (742) Bad night (2309) Order T-Shirt
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!

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  (970): last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!! http://tfl.nu/1bv7
  Replies (11) Good night (3927) Bad night (662) Order T-Shirt
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.

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  (217): My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you. http://tfl.nu/w1fj
  Replies (26) Good night (4842) Bad night (874) Order T-Shirt
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  (856): View more from New Jersey

  the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed

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  (856): the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed http://tfl.nu/39rg
  Replies (42) Good night (11020) Bad night (1210) Order T-Shirt
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  (901): View more from Tennessee

  I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"

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  (901): I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?" http://tfl.nu/efd9
  Replies (24) Good night (5780) Bad night (903) Order T-Shirt
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  (936): View more from Texas

  She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.

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  (936): She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while. http://tfl.nu/5c77
  Replies (33) Good night (1109) Bad night (8459) Order T-Shirt
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is

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  (480): he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is http://tfl.nu/i6zj
  Replies (13) Good night (2700) Bad night (1522) Order T-Shirt
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred

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  (508): Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level. (508): I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred http://tfl.nu/piwf
  Replies (10) Good night (2395) Bad night (795)
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  (580): View more from Oklahoma

  He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.

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  (580): He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages. http://tfl.nu/hdcq
  Replies (4) Good night (1552) Bad night (656) Order T-Shirt
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  (409): View more from Texas

  I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.

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  (409): I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look. http://tfl.nu/inz2
  Replies (4) Good night (430) Bad night (1142) Order T-Shirt
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  (775): View more from Nevada

  I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.

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  (775): I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked. http://tfl.nu/hbpw
  Replies (9) Good night (1115) Bad night (508) Order T-Shirt
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  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus

  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Yeah but the people love.

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  (781): Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus (908): Yeah but the people love. http://tfl.nu/k9ua
  Replies (2) Good night (820) Bad night (216)
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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything

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  (304): I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything http://tfl.nu/gg1p
  Replies (6) Good night (1052) Bad night (167)

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