Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Randomize