The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
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