last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
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I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
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he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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