I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
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