At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
we should paint friendship bongs
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