We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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