This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
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It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
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And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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