i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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