He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
i love accidental penises.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
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