The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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