puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
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i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
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I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I have tasted many bathrooms
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
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